Behave more like your cat.
I said that recently to someone who was profoundly shut down, both emotionally and somatically.
And I meant it.
Not because I think we humans should become less thoughtful.
But because many of us have become so disconnected from our own internal signals that we no longer know how to sense what we need.
A cat does not usually argue with herself about whether she is tired enough to rest.
She does not seem to feel guilty for wanting warmth, quiet, food, movement, contact, or distance.
She senses from within.
And then she responds.
Many of us humans do the opposite.
We override hunger.
We suppress tears.
We push through exhaustion.
We stay in situations that feel wrong.
We ignore our bodies.
We mistrust our instincts.
And then we call this maturity, professionalism, discipline, or even ‘success’.
But often it is just disconnection.
I think a great deal of modern life has trained many of us away from ourselves.
To live from our head and ignore our body.
To perform rather than feel.
To produce rather than notice.
To override rather than attune.
And then we wonder why so many of us feel anxious, flat, burned out, or lost.
A lot of us humans are not struggling because we are weak.
We are struggling because we have lost contact with some of our most basic capacities for healthy functioning:
the ability to notice what is happening in our body,
to respond to our legitimate needs without shame,
and to respect our own limits before exhaustion forces the issue.
That is where so much healing could begin.
Can I notice what my body is telling me?
Can I stay with a feeling, without immediately distracting myself from it?
Can I allow myself to need what I need without shame?
That is not regression.
That is development.
Of course, good clinical advice is always tailored to the person in front of us. Some of us may need to become less avoidant, less withdrawn, or less ruled by our instinct, not more.
But for those of us who are shut down, overridden, or over-cognitive, one of the great tasks of adult life may be to become wise enough to listen to instinct without being ruled by impulse.
So yes, sometimes my clinical advice is unexpectedly simple:
Behave a little more like your cat.